15 September 2005

week 2 of La liga

deportivo v atletico madrid
diego tristan, did you really shave a number 9 onto your head? why would you ever think that was a good idea? we can already see that you are number 9 from your jersey.
madrid were robbed! that depor goal at the end came in the 94:36 minute of 4 minues extra time (see the problem there?) and a depor player took out one of the madrid defenders in the box during the corner kick. i call foul.

real madrid v celta de vigo
speaking of foul....... both madrid sides were hard done by this past weekend. in a reverse of the famous spurs goal last season, celta score a goal that didn't go over the line. no complaints on the first goal - that was just the fault of the usual terrible madrid defending. once again, casillas does more than his fair share of defensive duties and makes a fantastic save on a celta penalty but couldn't get the rebound.

barcalona v mallorca
bad week for mallorca. no nonsense barca win this one with all kinds of nonsense from mallorca: 2 red cards for them and one of the boys dares to slap puyol in the face before making his way off! even though his hair is way too big, that's no reason to slap him!

week 2 of Serie A

roma v udinese
it was just one of those days. we didn't play badly, we just didn't have luck on our side. totti alone had 2 chances in the box that should have been goals that somehow he missed. oh, and cassano comes in & shows off his football talent to distract us from his toublemaking talents. i would be less depressed if it wasn't our first home game that we lost.
at least the new ball was flashy.

messina v fiorentina
have i mentioned luca toni lately? how pretty he is? how he's been in great form lately? oh yeah, and then there is the footballing aspect........
oh, where was i? yes, toni. who scored again and had other chances and set up fiore for what would have been a lovely goal. fiorentina were cruising 2-0 and then they just seemed to lose focus and let messina back in the game. maybe they were frightened by messina's keeper. did you see his hair??? that will be give me nightmares for weeks!

palermo v inter
great freakin game from palermo - the fans were lovin it! seeing a game like this makes me want to go live in palermo & have a season ticket. bonus: the cute pink shirts
inter are a mess in the back without zanetti & adriano is anonymous so it's not that big of a surprise when palermo are up 3-0. the surprise was that inter did not manage one of their famous comebacks for a draw. good for palermo. and santana is kinda cute.

13 September 2005

week 6 of ligue 1

marseille finally win, auxerre continues to lose & the same three teams continue to be unbeaten... st. etienne and....

ajaccio v nancy
another win for the corsicans! my haze of incredulous happiness continues. a nice header from lucas (who will be snapped up by a bigger club next season) seals the second win of the season for ajaccio. they still need to finish more of their chances but i won't start complaining yet.

lyon v monaco
the lyon fans welcome new boy fred with a lovely display of a giant brasilian flag. fred is so touched that he scores twice: in the fitst 5 minutes or so of each half. now that's the way to endear yourself to the fans. oh, and monaco, was buttercup the colour you were going for with the new away kit? pale gold? i think non. at least dechamps looked smart in his cute little monaco polo as his team was losing.

week 5 of the EPL

middlesbrough v arsenal
wow. lots of hair issues during this match. first and foremost: why is there a muppet on the head of xavier? and i think a few of the arsenal boys went to the barbershop before this game and had a trim. does your contract with l'oreal allow that robert? and hey, who knew queudrue was cute underneath that horrible hair! see what good hair v bad hair can do to a boy? anyway, a performance that gunner fans will want to forget: all flash, no results. there was a definite struggle to make anything happen near the box without their dear titi. what a shame..... AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
*wipes tears of laughter from eyes*

tottenham v liverpool
an actual entertaining 0-0: end to end play, lots of shots, disallowed goals for both sides and the real star of the show: cisse's hair. what exactly is that on top of his head? bird droppings? and why is it on his chin as well?

newcastle v fulham
mickey owen's first outing. and the midget doesn't score.
*checks william hill* what are those odds on souness being the first manager to be scaked this season?


italy: scotland almost shocked italy by leading for an hour but grosso saved azzurri blushes. we almost answer the burning question: how many glaring misses can bobo have in one game??? luckily, the italians woke up & my new imaginary boyfriend Toni scored a hattrick against Belarus. mmmmmmm Luca Toni.

england: after doing the bare mininmum against wales (deflected joey cole goal/almost own goal) things get worse for england: they lose to northern ireland. (yes, you hear the cheers of the scots after their draw against the italians and their WIN AWAY at norway and then this delightful defeat). the press are baying for sven's head and no one fails to miss hothead rooney's reaction (he even has to be calmed down during the game). oh, it gets worse. apparently things are so happy-go-lucky in the england camp that rooney reportedly lashed out at halftime and told rio ferdinand to "f*ck off", told his captain becks to "f*ck off you flash b*stard" and then tells assistant coach steve mcclaren to "f*ck off you c*nt".
what a nice boy.

usa: they take their revenge with a 2-0 win against a pedestrian mexican side sweetened by the fact that this result sends them to the world cup. nice work & goal from beasley, yet again.

other notes: mutu is back! his 2 goals against the czechs give romanians a shock win. it's a shame that it's already too late for them. france's old guard help them secure a win over the mighty faroe islands and a beautiful strike from titi (henry to the rest of you) breaks irish hearts. adriano's 2nd hattrick in a week sends brazil to germany while africa is where all the action is: togo and ghana at the world cup?? the ivory coast almost there but then cameroon (spurred on by promises of eto'o's money) claim victory and take control of the group while tunisia & morocco duke it out for the last spot.

i suck

dear listeners/readers,
this is my official apology for not keeping this blog up to date.... i hereby promise to be better.
love & kisses,